with the hive of activity my life has been recently lots of things have passed me by without me even giving them a second thought.....


now i have slowed down for two seconds and have actually took note of whats happened n recent months/weeks, i have to say IM NOT IMPRESSED!

i'm less than favourable of A FAIR FEW people at moment and its not just me being paranoid, stupid or picky, i have genuine beliefs that my life may well be far improved without certain people involved.

harsh i know. and so was the realisation that my 'dirty laundry' is there for everybody to view, so to speak.

If i have ever trusted anyone enough to share something with them i expect it to be kept that way, between US. it does not become public property once it leaves my vocal chords.if i wanted to air my business i would.thats only common sense see?

I havent told anyone this is the way i feel right now, but i figured if you had done something like that then maybe you'd at least have the decency to admit your faults and tell me about it. if not its pretty weak of you as an individual.

so here it is. in black and white.

IF you have treated me like the mug ive realised i am and if you think there is a friendship/relationship to salvage i think you know whats gonna happen. we need to [link] more bullshitting,passing the buck, denials or "sorry mate i was drunk". i need honesty.

if not, i do hope you have enjoyed making things less than easy (for both myself and yourself), i also hope you find another mug willing to share their head and heart with you.the world is a pretty cold place, with no-one to talk to its even worse, which is harsh as i now know there are so few people i trust/care about.

im sure in time things will work out for the best.

i know this doesnt apply to everyone, of course i know that, however it's particulary hard to trust people now......as im sure any level headed person would understand.

IN OTHER THOUGHTS...
(on reading old journals i feel as though something so close to me passed by and im never gonna see or have it, i say again, but i wasnt even lucky enough to first time around.i hope all is well and wish no pain or sadness, we all move on.:-D the least i can do is be a friend. to think that if the past had been different i may not have had that opportunity makes me rather empty.)